My older child has built resentment towards the second child, what should I do?

My older child has built resentment towards the second child, what should I do?

Often times when little brothers or little sisters come into the picture and require a great deal of mom and dad’s attention, older siblings will often feel neglected or left out.  This is not to say that your older child doesn’t recognize or understand the great deal of care and attention that a small child needs, but rather this is your older child likely expressing some very natural feelings of frustration, sadness, and loss regarding his former position within the family that has since been assumed by his younger sibling.  Try to avoid the temptation of punishing or scolding your child if he expresses his resentment or behaves in a baby-like or regressive way, and try to approach him more from a place of support and understanding that he may be worried that he’s not his mother’s only little boy anymore.  You’ll also want to make sure that you continue to find time each day shared solely between you and your older child and reserve this time for something specific that he enjoys.  Encourage your older child to be your special helper in raising his younger sibling, whether it be helping at feeding time, changing diapers, reading bedtime stories, or anything of the like.  By helping your older sibling to process his feelings of resentment and reassuring him that he will be loved and cared for just as much as when he too was a baby, you’ll not only help your relationship with him flourish but you’ll also pave the way for a healthy and loving relationship to develop between him and his younger sibling.